Sharkify hello my pretty hello my pretty

actuates:

HOW TO PLAY SOCCER IN GYM CLASS:
1. Get the ball
2. Pass it to someone who actually knows how to play
3. Run.

July 24 132732

warsquirtle:

Has anybody ever actually gotten salmonella from eating raw cookie dough or are people just trying to stop me from living my life

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methlabrador:

what if one day for 24 hours everyone with a tumblr turned into whatever their url is 

July 24 306173

relush:

i love sleeping. it’s the only time when you can escape reality.

July 24 266528
July 24 33978
15-Year-Old African Kid Tells Madonna To Go ‘Have Sex’ with Herself →

almightykushlord:

Dakarai Molokomme, a 15-year-old starving child from a small village in Zimbabwe, has just told , one of the most famous pop stars in the world, to  and f*** , the local media are reporting exclusively.

“Yes, it’s true, I told Madonna to go f*** herself. Do you want to know why?” Dakarai asked. “It’s the same thing every time with these snobby rich Americans. Every once in a while they come to show us their support for the so-called eradication of poverty by adopting a child from a starving family, but they actually do more harm than good. Transracial international adoptions are part of the white savior industrial complex,” Dakarai explained.

In further discussions with journalists from the media, the  stated that “none of the children here actually want to be taken away from their family and friends so they can be displayed as some kind of trophy in the homes of self-righteous singers or actors who want to score some points with the media and Oprah.”

“If they really want to help us, they should get Big Pharma to ship us some anti-retroviral drugs for the AIDS epidemic, or build schools and hospitals. If they don’t want to do that, then they can all go f** themselves!” the child told reporters.

The 15-year-old also stated that he would say the same thing to any one of those American or European “faux humanitarian posers”, except for Bono, whom he said he would also kick in the groin.

“Bono’s efforts to save the African savage from itself prove that the colonial imperative is alive and well,” Dakarai said as he walked with other village children collecting sticks to build a tree fort.

THIS IS THE RAWEST 15 YEAR OLD ALIVE

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fohk:

Text Over Film

July 24 7450

stylesinaflowercrown:

The other night I was out for dinner with old friends and one of the guys started talking shit about girls who like boybands and was like “they just go crazy and scream the whole time! Nobody else ever acts like that!” and I was like “men at sporting matches” and my other guy friend turned around and was like “YOOOOOO” and high-fived me while the other one just sat there looking like I’d destroyed his entire understanding of the world happy days

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im-a-walking-paradox:

the ULTIMATE comeback and im not playing

July 24 636562

mishakoalins:

A default ring tone is heard. 100 moms look at their purses.

July 24 259260

pheebadohdoh:

fantastic-nonsense:

thneedprincess:

headfullofpotter:

thatstheriddle:

headfullofpotter:

stop

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making

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animated

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characters

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so

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attractive

I don’t mind it as long as it’s not an animated anima-

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oh…

i think

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this needs

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to be

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updated

yeah

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it definitely

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does

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Excuse me

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I

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think

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you’re

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forgetting

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some

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I think you guys forgot the hottest fucker of them all

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